Cinderella? More Like The Ugly Step Sister.

After years of envy over Barbies flawless feet and a lifetime of adoring a certain pair of ruby slippers, I've come to the realization that despite how amazing these shoes and feet are, Cinderella has the best feet and shoes on the planet.

Both are truly magical!

She is the only girl I know who can wear clear shoes and not have her feet looking like five meat nuggets at the end of a big sausage.


I'd love to be able to wear shoes similar to her glass slippers but unfortunately, in reality when you put on a tight pair of heels your feet squish up against the inside of them. If they didn't they would slop around on our feet and eventually fall off. They need to be firm, meaning they need to squish.

Normally that wouldn't matter to us, as long as the shoes look good or feel great, but when the shoes are clear, everything is clear.

There is no hiding your chipped toenail polish you didn't think to fix because normally it would be covered.

There is no hiding your nine perfect length toenails and the dodgy broken one on the end.

There is no hiding the bandaids that your last pair of firm shoes forced you to wear to cover the blisters.

There is also no hiding the little hairs ontop of your toes that you normally wax off.

AND if none of that applies to you (which I highly doubt), then brace yourself for a harsh reality.

Feet sweat, oh yes, don't be fooled by a cold winter breeze. If your feet are in enclosed shoes, they get warm, which means that in between those little piggies is going to produce some serious moisture.. If they don't sweat, they at least heat up which causes the clearness of the shoe to fog up and I don't know about you, but the thought that my shoes would look like my toes have taken a trip down Lovers Lane doesn't really appeal to me.

All of these things are putting a dampener on the whole glass slipper fantasy because look at how beautiful those shoes are!


Ahh, just another unrealistic expectation Disney gave me growing up. Like they said 'A dream is a wish your heart makes.' And my heart can keep on dreaming for Cinderella feet.


Until then, I'm stuck with ten stubby digits on two little hooves aka Not-Quite-As-Ugly Stepsister Feet.

Damn you Disney! Damn youuuuuuuu!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I know exactly what you mean. I have a pair of Steve Madden clear blue jelly ballet flats and on hot days my feet look like they are taking a steam sauna in my shoes!!!

Bury Me In Velvet said...

grr WHY ARE MY COMMENTS NOT WORKING? BLOGGER, YOU NEED TO VISIT THE DOCTOR!

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